How To: Pass As an Adult

It’s summertime. Which means you might be sleeping till noon, watching 3 seasons of The Office in one day and generally furthering your transformation into a sloth day by day. Meanwhile, you should (probably) be getting at least a few things done while you have actual free time during these hazy months. Or maybe you still want to do nothing but you need to convince your mom you haven’t gone full sloth mode yet. Either way here are a few helpful tricks regarding how to feel like you’ve got your life together and are a functioning member of society without sacrificing your Netflix habit

1. Make your bed

This is the most understated way to fool a visiting parent that you definitely did not eat dinner in your bed again last night. It takes approximately 5 seconds in the morning and makes you feel accomplished before you’ve even left the house.

2.  Buy fresh flowers

Nothing screams I am a functioning adult like fresh flowers. Nothing.

3. Email back on time

Another sure fire way to convince the universe that you definitely are on top of it. Adding a long signature (with your college, major, future first born child’s name) is key.

4. Bring snacks 

This is such a mom move and you will be thanking yourself later when the drive through line is too long or you’re just bored sitting in a waiting room.

5. Take care of a plant 

Not only can you take care of yourself, you can take care of another life form too, nice. I recommend a succulent or cactus for the beginning taking-care-of-er.

6. Eat breakfast

As a firm believer that this is indeed the most important meal of the day and also an avid connoisseur of all breakfast foods, this is vital for me. Bring on the avocado toast!

7. Wake up before noon

Even on the off days. (Some off days)

8. Make a to-do list

I am by trade a list maker. (see the list you’re currently reading) But tell me there is anything more satisfying than crossing off a to-do list?

Best of luck on adult-ing adventures and when in doubt, throw together a meal that didn’t come from a box for good measure.

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